My Grandmother passed away this year (which was extremely difficult for me and my family) and, at 24 years old, I had to reconsider friendships because of my inner 16 year old’s insecurities. 

I was with my Grandmother a lot while she was in the hospital/hospice and I learned a lot about life and death and the moments in between. There were times where I could see her slipping and I saw her fight for control over her own body. 

People never give up life willingly.

It all ends with kicking and screaming. 

Eventually we understand that there is nothing we can do but acceptance doesn’t happen until the last second, until the last burst of life passes through our lips. 

And I do believe in peace after death. I refuse to believe their is no reward for suffering. 

Watching her go through all of this made me think, a lot, about the people in my life. 

I tried to be there for my Grandmother when she was on her way out just as she had been there my whole life and I wondered:

Would my friends be there for me in the end? 

The ones that would be, I kept.

Those who wouldn’t, I left.

It was just that simple.

If 2012 is really the year the world is going to end *insert eye roll here* then I am going to spend it with the people that care as much about me as I do them.

This year I am going to let it all go, lighten the load and breath easy. 

I think my Granny would have wanted that. 

…Okay, I am done with my depressing (although still uplifting because I am a big ‘ole contradiction) rant.

: )